Hello Leveraged Mamas! Take your pick between the video or the transcript below, to find out five things you could eliminate, to get more Me Time in your day! Warning, just a few small expletives, sorry!
You’ve come here because you want time
You’re desperate for some Me Time.
Aaaand, you’re busy – very very very very very busy, just like all Mamas are.
I’ve got some easy wins for you – well I may have, let’s see how we go.
So you’re poor
Time poor, that is.
You’re likely not to have any Me Time on a daily basis.
And when I talk about Me Time I’m talking about time to yourself to do anything you want.
Not time to yourself to do something scheduled, but just to do anything.
So for example today I have an hour’s Me Time – what will I do, hmm, I might just do nothing. I might think about my future, I might do some exercise, I might go for a walk, I might do some meditation, I might bake, whatever.
Actual scheduled Me Time to do something that’s important to you – you alone, not important to anyone else.
But, with your life as a busy mama, you’re time poor, and I understand that, I live that.
Maybe you don’t have money for a babysitter.
Maybe you work full time because you need to.
Maybe you can’t afford to take time off work, or work less.
Maybe you don’t have family around to help look after your kids, to give you some time out.
Maybe it’s just really difficult for some reason to get Me Time, on a regular basis.
Maybe you just don’t have that freedom.
So before you freak out and think Oh My God I’m just, I’m going to spin out, I’m so like… I get a bit “la-la” if I don’t get enough Me Time, actually I get quite grumpy.
So before you hit the dumps with this, or spend hard earned money on a babysitter, or reduce your working hours – you know, you might not be able to, or do anything else that might impact on your financial situation – have a look at some of these common time thieves that might be an easy source of claiming back some of your time for yourself.
So, I’m just going to pull these out of my head – number one, and this is probably one of my worst ones:
#1 Going for a scroll
Yes, I said scroll. Going for a scroll: on Facebook; on Instagram; on Twitter; through your emails, whatever.
How many times a day do you go for a mindless scroll?
Sometimes, I don’t know, I caught myself doing it fifteen times a day – probably more! Just – hmm, got a spare moment, pick up my phone, go for a scroll.
That time is stealing your mindfulness, stealing your presence, stealing your brain, stealing your Me Time.
This is your Me Time you’re choosing to spend it going for a scroll.
Now I don’t know about you, but when I think about “hey I need some Me Time”, I don’t think about “I’m going to sit on Facebook for an hour” because that doesn’t sound very enriching to me.
So if you spend a lot of time picking up your phone constantly, looking at things, “ooh that’s so cute” – just have a think about how much benefit you’re actually getting out of it.
Is it really enriching? Is it soulfully enriching for you?
Or is it something that you could perhaps reduce?
What if you reduced that time to ten percent, or just eliminated it for a day?
How much time would you get back?
It doesn’t have to be forever. But there is one source – that checking, going for a scroll – is a source of time that you can claim back – without having to hire a baby sitter, without having to reduce your work hours, without having to impact any other part of your life.
It’s something you can do right now after you’ve finished watching/reading this video/post (which you probably found on Facebook!)
Other common time thieves…?
#2 Negative people
And by that I mean, people that, you know, they might come to you for advice, they might pick up the phone to you quite a lot, but your advice is going nowhere with them.
You might be giving some support, and they’re just not hearing it, they just want to have a dump, on you.
That’s a big time thief – it’s maybe not as common, but hey, you never know, have a look around.
Who is taking your time and not giving you much back in return?
Can you think of anyone, or a number of people that are taking from your Me Time?
How much time could you claim back?
Again, if you just put some boundaries up – just for a week and went, for these particular people I ain’t getting nothing back from them right now and I’m just going to put this little boundary up, so I can have that time for myself.
Are there any negative people in your life, or people that you’re putting stuff into but they’re not giving you anything back – that you could maybe just push back a little bit?
How much time could you claim back there?
Okay here’s a really good one. Another common time thief:
#3 Looking for shit
Seriously – looking for shit, in a disorganised space.
When you can’t find your keys.
Your nice jeans.
The top you like.
Your kids’, I don’t know, anything!
Just looking for anything in a disorganised, cluttered space.
This used to steal so much time from me.
I was really really busy, so the house was a bit of a mess and it was quite cluttered and disorganised.
I used to spend a lot of time picking things up, you know like my baby’s toys and stuff because they weren’t organised.
I’d spend so much time looking for my keys, because they didn’t have a dedicated space for me to hang them on, so I’d just throw them down and they would disappear into the bench which, Oh God, the bench was my clutter-magnet – we’ve all got them. So I spent so much time looking for stuff, honestly.
If you didn’t have clutter – if things were organised and you had easy access to go – I know where that is, great, I’ve got that.
How much easier would that be?
This is another one – the baby’s drawer full of all her little bits and pieces like her cups and bowls and cutlery and things – it was a fricken shambles – an ABSOLUTE shambles, and I spent, I don’t know how many hours of my life digging through, looking for the right sized lid – every day. I’d just get like, “Oh my God” and the baby would think this was fun, and she would come along and help me throw and dig things out of this stupid drawer.
So I cleaned it up one day. I just spent ten minutes tidying it up – so I can visually see everything in the drawer now, and I can just open the drawer, whip it out – here’s that lid, because they were all in the same place – like with like. Oh my God I saved myself so much time!
So, a little bit more Me Time – bonus! That’s a massive bonus one. Okay, a little bit of effort up front to clean, tidy and organise, and put a damn key ring up!
But the pay off is just epic.
So this next one you’re probably going to hate me for.
But if you didn’t stop reading after I talked about Facebook then anything’s fair game.
The next major time thief that is stealing your Me Time is:
In all its forms – you know, you can have Netflix on the computer.
We used to have Sky, we used to pay $140 a month because we had Sky Movies, HD, MySky – you know, like to record stuff – and we had the Arts Channel because I just love watching that, and we had Sports and, bla bla bla.
And because we paid $140 a month for that [expletive] Sky – cable TV – I wanted to get my money’s worth!
So I would actually stay up later every night, just to watch more TV. I’d save heaps of movies, and line them up and be like oh this is so great.
We don’t have a TV anymore.
Oh my God radical! Stay with me!
I don’t know how much time I got back after we got rid of that damn thing.
We don’t have a TV now. We do watch movies occasionally on the computer. Things like that.
But no, we don’t watch TV.
Because seriously, at night like I’m really tired anyway, like I get up at 5am (ooh stay with me!) so by 6pm, I was just telling a friend of mine today actually, I turn into a pumpkin. I atrophy – at 6 o’clock because I’ve been up for so long.
I can’t go out, I can’t socialise, I love this saying: our bins go out more than we do haha.
But, we don’t have a TV and it’s not sucking our time.
I’ll study at night, I’ll read articles that I’ve saved. I’m a voracious learner so I’ll read heaps of stuff.
We talk to each other…
And yeah, I get a bit of extra Me Time to just day dream and think about stuff, because I’m not staring at the zombie box – no, what is it called, oh this is really offensive but it’s the idiot box, some people call it.
If you’re still with me, that’s awesome!
How much time would you have if you didn’t watch TV for a week?
I know, this is a radical and controversial suggestion, but just think about it.
Here’s another goody:
Obligations are stealing your Me Time.
I mean things like you’ve promised to do something with a friend or family member every week, but it’s not so fun anymore…
Anyone that knows me will be laughing at this because I am not the sort of person to be obliged – haha!
By anything! In fact I am the obligation repeller.
If anyone even looks like they think that I should do something for them – that they expect something from me, I’m like – see ya bye! Out, gone.
So take a leaf out of my books and limit your obligations.
This probably doesn’t win me any friends, seriously, but that’s fine because I’m an introvert.
I don’t need many friends, I just need a few really good ones haha.
So I don’t do working bees.
I’ll pay the extra money at the Toy Library so that I don’t have to come and do the work they make you do if you join the Toy Library – have you heard of that?!
At least they give you the option. I’ll pay that extra money! I’m going to pay you extra just so that I don’t have to come and dig up a sandpit or clean some toys, or whatever.
Not my thing eh. But as an introvert I need all that time – so much time.
So have a look at your own obligations – what are you currently obliged to, and do they still apply?
Are you still getting a lot back out of the obligation you’re committed to?
You can always so no.
You can always say – no, not this month.
Not for the next six months.
Not ever again.
You can do it! You can say no.
You are empowered to say no
Tell them I sent you and told you to say no.
Because it’s a powerful thing.
If they ain’t working for you, if they’re not getting you closer to your goals and your visions, to the things that you care about – if they’re just not important to you, then obligations are sucking away your Me Time.
So that’s a good one – think about that.
So, clearly you can see that I’m quite energised by this.
I’m pretty good at saying no
Honestly I’ve become more animated throughout our little chat here because I’m just so into saying no.
But my Me Time stealer is probably reading. I love reading – love it, in all it’s forms (podcasts too).
But I do go a little overboard at times – like I have an app called Pocket that I save things I’ve found on the web to read, and sometimes it has 300 articles in there and I feel obliged – there’s that dirty word again – to read them, because they must have been important when I saved them, right?
So it’s like ARGH, going for a stroll through my reading.
So that’s a good one for me, that I need to keep on top of, and say no to.
I hope that I’ve just given you a couple of ideas to think about.
This isn’t going to give you a solid block of time where you can just leave the house – because say if your child is sleeping, or in the house, well obviously I wouldn’t recommend that haha.
But – what it is going to do is give you back some presence of mind, some space in your brain – something for you just to even sit with a cup of tea and look out the window, and think about your life, the people you love and the things you like to do, plan ahead, whatever.
Or even do some exercise! Hey it is possible to do some exercise with your children around! I’m saying this now because, actually I don’t really do that much haha!
But I’m going to try now because I feel like a hypocrite if I don’t go and do that. I’m going to do it like, straight after this because I’m not going to be on Facebook, or going for a stroll, or on my Pocket, I’m going to do some exercise I promise you!
So there’s some Me Time! Yoga! Yes! I’m going to do ten minutes – no twenty minutes of Yoga because I walk my talk! Ha ha.
I would love to hear what you think.
Is it this simple or are there more time thieves out there?
What (or who) is your biggest time thief?
I would love to hear from you, like if any of this has resonated with you, if you’ve managed to find some more time for yourself because of anything I’ve talked about today I would love to hear from you.
Let me know in the comments!
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